Emotional Roller Coaster

Tuesday we should have a nice, quiet family day at home. The evening's entertainment was supposed to be horseback riding at a nearby horse ranch. We did not get to enjoy either of those things. Instead, I received a call from my sister, who had received a call from the Hospice staff caring from my dad. They said that my dad was getting worse, and that he really wanted to meet Vanya before he went back to the Ukraine. So, we ended up making the 3-hour trip to Grand Rapids to spend some time with my dad.

(If you want to know more about my dad, you can click here to see my sister's blog. She has a little synopsis of what's been going on with my dad for the last 1-1/2 years. You can also read the 2 posts below that to see some more pictures of Vanya. For a special treat, you can even watch a video of Vanya talking. It's a classic!!!)





















I'm not sure how or why I thought to think of it, but we also brought a translator with us. She is a sophomore at IU and was born in the Ukraine. Despite being here in the U.S. since she was 4-years old, she speaks fluent Russian. Even though Vanya mostly speaks Ukrainian, he understands Russian. This young lady was a godsend: we asked her to explain to Vanya that my dad is very sick (we did NOT mention the whole dying issue), that he wanted to meet Vanya, and that he wasn't contagious. He seemed to understand and was fine with the explanation.

What he wasn't fine with was the puking issue. He got sick twice on the way there, and. . . twice on the way home! I was really impressed that he was willing to eat dinner right after the second time! We went to a place that had both KFC and Taco Bell. We thought he'd want tacos since he's had those here and really liked them. Nope, he chose chicken strips and sure enough, he did eat them. I had to laugh when he wouldn't eat the mashed potatoes. Apparently in the Ukraine, nothing is instant or pre-made. I guess the mashed potatoes at KFC don't stand up to the real thing!

I have to say we were so proud of him with my dad. While Dad's not in a hospital (he's in an assisted nursing home-- in his own room), nor is he hooked up to any machines, he does not look well. To any little kid, I think it would be a daunting thing, especially when you've never met the man before. He politely shook Dad's hand, and smiled at him. Dad seemed content to just watch Vanya as he interacted with Tim and I, my sister and nephew, and the translator. I asked Vanya to wear his Michigan State hat for my dad, and Dad did notice it. He later asked Vanya if he could wear it for awhile. Vanya was very gracious and handed it over without any qualms. Dad was very quiet and slept part of the time. He's getting harder to understand as he becomes weaker. We stayed for about 2-1/2 hours, and when we left, Vanya was great about giving him a hug goodbye. Unless a miracle happens, I don't believe Dad will be around when Vanya comes back. It was, and is, very sad to think about!

On the way home, we asked the translator to ask Vanya some things like, what is his favorite subject in school (writing-- yeah!), does he like to read (no-- boo! We'll work on the later!), does he have any clothes or toys of his own (no :-( ), what does he do at recess time at school (run-- cross country or track, anyone?), does he have a best friend (yes, 3-- potential brothers for him, sons for us??????), does he like school food or Papa's food the best (Papa's hands down!), and does he know that he goes back to "school" on Friday (no-- big, huge eyes!). When asked if he missed school, he replied, "NO! I want to stay here in America with my new Mama and Papa!" We had her tell him that we would be visiting him soon (more on that in another post) and that he could back and "visit" us again. While he seemed sad that he couldn't stay, he looked pleased that we would come see him. Lastly, we asked her to tell him that he needed to start thinking about what toys, if any, he wanted to take back to school, knowing that they wouldn't really be his anymore. He'd have to share them. He nodded with understanding and then promptly threw up!

We got home about 11:00 that night, and we decided Vanya could pass on the shower (much to his disappointment). Between the emotional roller coaster and Vanya being sick so many times, it was a hard day for everyone.

Once again, if you see any pictures without Vanya in them, he probably had the camera!!